Did I ever tell you about the time ...

I read David Sedaris' Santaland Diaries (or was it Barrel Fever?) and then went out and got myself a job as an elf for a 'celebrity Santa' at the first indoor mall in America, Southdale in Edina, MN?

Well, I did. And if you should ever want to hear of my own adventures in Santaland, buy me a couple of hot toddies and we'll sit a spell and I'll delight you. Or do my damnest, anyway.

Merry Christmas, little dovies.